Aaaand here’s the update, ie. this is where things get really fucked up.
James found me on facebook. This is our exchange over facebook email.
James: i am sitting around thinking, its late, there is this girl on my mind and i want to say hello…and how do i say hello… i remember her last name…. so, hello :)
James: can we talk?
Me: What would we be talking about?
James: the world, space, the way your smile lights up my day…
Me: I don’t really appreciate being treated this way. I really wish you could have gotten the insecurites under control, because it seemed like we had a good thing going there. Maybe if we run into each other again, we can be friends, but sadly, I’m really not interested in anything else.
James: my insecurities were never in me, they were in you.
James: and frankly, if we had such a good thing going you wouldnt let it go over a misunderstanding… but thats your deal, not mine
James: i happen to really like you….
Me: Right. Ok. i seem to remember you saying your friends had to reassure you over and over that I was into you. I also seem to remember you throwing in the towel because you made up a story in your head how I’d gone home with some dude. Oh, and you also didn’t want to date someone who was going on other dates. I think you were the insecure one.
This then moved to ichat. I lost the first conversation because I got super pissed and shut it down w/o saving. I went back on to see if I could retrieve it and he sent me a message saying I was playing games. This is what ensued.
James: oh come on, you arent done yet…
James: jealous?
James: how could i be jealous of somebody i do not even know?
Me: well give me a better explanation
Me: also, i’m not really the one playing games here
Me: what have i done to you?
Me: really??
James: there are no games
James: you want to know whats up?
Me: i want to know what i did to you?
James: i want a chance to get to know you and i want you to reconsider…..
James: i like you
James: alot
Me: you still haven’t answered my question
Me: because you keep turning this around on me
James: i apologize, you did nothing
James: im not trying to turn anything around on you
James: i just really like you
James: no games
James: i want to know about your past by being a part of your future
Me: the only thing your going to get me to agree on is that we might be friends in the future
James: so you have no feelings for me?
Me: no, not anymore
Me: you acted really fucked up
Me: and i have no interest in getting involved in that
Me: and i’d say thats fair
Me: because you weren’t who you made out to be
Me: i’m sure you’re still really fun to talk to, thats not going to change, but theres a whole other side thats weird’
Me: and i don’t want to have to worry about if i don’t call you are you going to think i’m with someone else
Me: thats a bad way to start
James: *my name deleted*
Me: James
James: you are right
James: i am sorry for acting the way i did
James: i really like you, and i reacted improperly…
Me: ok, apology accepted. i still don’t want to go out with you again. i’m sorry
Me: now this is where you say, “ok, well I hope we’ll run into each other again sometime”
20 min later….
James: this is where i say, if you really wanted to know me you would have asked……
Me: asked you what?
Me: why you acted this way?
Me: i thought i did several times
James: why do you keep responding? you arent supposed to be there when i ask those questions….
Me: lol
Me: so….was that the question i was supposed to be asking?
James: what does it matter?
Me: it doesn’t really, now i’m just curious
James: oh, please, i am James i am here to please your curiosities
Me: hahah you’re the one who was posing the question
Me: do whatever you want
James: i just want to see your ass
Me: ok, now thats my cue to leave
Me: take it easy James
James: lol
Then it got creepier (yes…it is possible). I signed off after the “take it easy” and when I looked for the file this morning there was a new one from after i had signed off.
James: you were already gone
James: you just want a toy, you were gone the entire time
James: i know :)
James: you are just a product of kharma :)
James: if you really liked me you wouldnt sway so easily
James: so please do not tell me we had something good going when you arent even up for fighting for it
James: i am a great catch
James: so is a nice chilean bass
James: i like you
James: i like you alot…
James: im sorry i got weird, im not used to feeling this way….. but i like it
James: hey, can i have just a minute more?
James: a simple yes or fuck off would suffice
James: lady, i am the same man you met….
1:15 AM
James: stop ignoring me…
I’m just bummed cause it had been a really long time since I felt like I connected with someone that way. I mean, its not many men I take to see the balls on campus. Bah, too bad i went to see them with MR. CRAZY! So James, if you ever read this, fuck off. But thanks for getting me to finally start the blog! :)
09/25/2009 at 7:43 pm
I have a friend whose similarly pathetic crazypants ex of-very-short-length-of-time-dating could not get over the very special 2 weeks they had, during which he went from perfectly awesome to crazy jealous and insane in front of her friends.
She tired of this, broke up with him and created a toerrent of WATB. After a few exchanges like the one you’ve described here, he actually sent her an e-mail of himself as Lloyd Dobbler, holding a radio above his head, with HILARIOUS MIDI-quality sound clip of Peter Gabriel added.
Of course, the real tragedy, besides the fact that my friend had to date this cobag, is that he was an environments developer for the Ratchet and Clank series. His crazyness kept me from getting free video games and for that, I will never forgive him. :)
09/25/2009 at 7:49 pm
Oh, and the punch line? My friend is Quebecois. She has never seen Say Anything, so I had to explain what the hell it meant. So it was not only FAIL for creepy, but also for cultural bias.
09/25/2009 at 11:21 pm
Hahahah! Omg, poor girl and poor you! Bummer she couldn’t suck it up until Christmas ;).
09/26/2009 at 9:18 am
The campus balls are something special. You can’t just show them to anyone. I’d wait for marriage.
09/26/2009 at 1:08 pm
This guy should write lyrics for Michael Bolton. “I want to know about your past by being a part of your future?” BEE-ARF.
1) Nobody should take themselves this seriously.
2) Nobody should be this loaded down by cliches.
3) Nobody could sound more pathetic or desperate or self-absorbed if he tried.
But hey, I respect that he’s an ass man.