Ok, I’ve got another post I’m working on in the same vein as the last.  (yep, surprise surprise, baby boy was not the last to get all jerky after sex)  but its not done yet.  To bide some time, here are my top three things that my ex did that made me want to throttle him.  Now they’re just making me giggle though.  In no particular order:

1.  Took a swig of beer while I was going down on him for the first time. 
our exchange:

me:  “mmffgmfs”
him: “slurp”
me:  “mgghsd…..did you just take a swig of beer?”
him: “…uuhhh…nooommaayybeeokyes”
me:  “uuhhh wtf?”
him: “what you’re doing was so good, and the beer is so good, i wanted to have them together!”
me:  “!!”  *nice job on the flattery, but I’m still kinda pissed*
him: “aww come on, I’m sorry, really!  just get back to what you were doing, comeeoonn pleeassei’msorrryyyyy…waahhh!”
me:  “sure, fine, whatever”  *oh god, just shut up!..rolls eyes*

2.  On an 8 hour roadtrip, he woke me up by pretending to be an alarm clock.  The exchange in the car:

me:  “Hey, wake me up in 20 min.”
him:  “Ok.”
20 min later
BEEP BEEEP BEEEEP!!
me:  *WTF??!*
him: BEEP BEEP BEEP
me: “What are you doing??!!!”
him:  “You said to wake you up in 20 min.”
me:  “Why would you do it like that?!?!?”
him: “huh?”
me:  *ok, not worth it*

Now if you know me at all, if you only know me a little bit, you know I can’t stand being abrubtly woken up (although honestly, I don’t know anyone who does like it, so I would have thought this went without saying…obviously not).  This was already 6 months into the relationship.  It may sound trivial, but jeezus cherist people, if after 6 months you don’t know that I HATE being woken up like that, well Fuck you!

3.  He said my favorite dress that I had made in China looked like a nurse’s uniform and then couldn’t understand why that might not be a compliment.  Even after I tried to explain it several times.  Sigh.

Add your own top 3 if ya like!

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